Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Tubas and such

When you are a newlywed, you tend to gloss over certain things. Like, oh honey, I know you'll put the toilet seat down next time, besides, I like the refreshing feel of cold water on my booty at four in the morning. Or, you forgot to take the garbage out? No problem, those swarming flies looked hungry anyway.

But some things, you may want to pay a little more attention to.

We knew each other pretty well by the time we got married. We had dated since high school and then there was the engagement period that we now refer to as "when time stood still". It only lasted 3ish years, but seriously, it was long.

During that time we talked about a lot of things, including our future children and what we thought they would be like. We had lots of laughs over the possibilities that lay ahead. His athletic ability, my height, his charm, my eyes, his smile, my musical inclinations, his brains...did I mention my height?

Then there was the flip side, which was equally entertaining. They could have his height, my athletic ability, his vocal stylings, my need for orthodontia, his hair line, my lack of love for a good mathematical equation...

and that's when I asked

What if you, Mr. Professional Athlete, have a son who plays the tuba in the marching band?

He didn't even hesitate to say - then I will learn to love the marching band. (Okay, he hesitated a little, give him a break, will ya, people?).

Then we had Lainey. As a paranoid first time mom, I was reading everything I could about milestones and when infants should be doing what. She never really rolled over, but I thought - hey, she's just a content baby, no problem with that. At six months she sat up, hallelujah, we're right on track. And then she sat. And sat some more. For the next.five.months.

Girlfriend didn't want to roll, never really cared to crawl and pulling herself up?
No thanks, my mom can hold me.

Finally, at the ripe old age of 17 months, she walked. It was a bloomin' miracle. We had to make an appointment at the Shriner's Hospital because her feet turned out so far, but hey, she was walking!

Then I got pregnant with the Littles.

Sometime during my pregnancy, Marcia, a dear family friend, sent my old pediatric medical records to my mom. What a gift!

Um, no.

As we were skimming through them, my hubby came across a form that my mom filled out for my 3 year well child visit. There were lots of questions but one in particular caught his attention.

Please put this piece of paper on the ground. Can your child jump over it?

She circled "no".

I laughed so hard I had to pee.

My poor hubby. He thought his genes were stronger than mine. But hey, I have done my part. Our girls are going to be seriously tall.

Which should help when they have to carry that big old glockenspiel in the marching band.

10 comments:

  1. Ha Ha Ha!! What a funny girl you are. Apparently uncoordinated as all get out, but FUNNY! ;)

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  2. good for you, honey....you did what? :)

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  3. Oh, you'll have to excuse me. I was just celebrating the fact that I was finally able to comment your blog. I didn't have any of the account options so I had to create a gmail account. Simple enough, but it became celebration worthy when after the 57th rejection I finally hit username paydirt with Shannon.Fox.77 :)

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  4. loved this one.. and many others.
    You have a gift for writing!That's a plus! The height is beautiful and they will thank you.
    -Deb Wallace

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  5. thanks Deb! hope you and the family are well in California!

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  6. HILARIOUS, Jess. Scott and I have had the same conversations about our future spawn. It seems we just never know what combination God will choose! We've always feared we'd have an Amazon girl and a teeny boy - so far we're on our way. :) Thanks for taking the time to share these funny little stories. I love them!

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  7. There is SO nothing wrong with the Glockenspiel because all the boys will be able to see your beautiful girls!!!

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  8. LOL I am laughing so hard!!! You are hilarious and I love it! Miss you girl! :)

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  9. YOu are so hilarious, i love it. Eric is out of town and i thought i'd be sleeping and no, i'm stuck facebooking and reading your hilarious blog. Girl, you have a gift. You should write a book.

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